In a shocking and unprecedented act of political bipartisanship, the President has reached out to his predecessor and offered him a position in the Obama Administration. Former President Bush has accepted the position as Obama’s newly appointed “Blame Czar” and will travel with the President to all major political events in order to remind the audience that Obama is not the same person who led the country for the previous eight years.
In an effort to quell the rising tide of Tea Party protesters, Mr. Bush will hold regular press conferences at the White House to explain his role in decisions that create a public backlash. His first task is reportedly to inform the American people that it was his idea that frequent presidential golf outings would improve Obama’s public image during the economic downturn. Apparently, it was Mr. Bush’s advice that led to Obama hitting the golf course more times during the first year of his presidency than Bush did throughout his time in office[1. Politico. Watch this Drive: Obama golfs more than Bush. http://bit.ly/2AfChR.]. I suspect Mr. Bush was also the architect of Obama’s frequent vacations and use of Air Force One for remote dinner dates.
Once this situation is cleared up, the former Commander-in-Chief is expected to rebuke Cheney’s assertion that the Bush Administration left Obama’s team up-to-date analysis and a comprehensive recommendation for military strategy in Afghanistan. If this were true, then it could mitigate the right-wing claims that President Obama has been “dithering” rather than addressing the important decision of whether or not to deploy additional troops.
Bush’s promotion to “Blame Czar” represents a unique strategy for managing public dissent in an effort to save the President’s tanking poll numbers[2. Gallup. Obama Quarterly Approval Average Slips 9 Points to 53%. http://bit.ly/2gJ5Id.]. Though Obama has already set a record with his sharp decline in approval ratings, if the tactic is successful, it could mitigate the effects on his 2012 campaign. More immediately, the “Blame Czar” might be able to help rescue some Democrat legislators from the 2010 elections. We will be watching closely as Mr. Bush passes through the intense vetting process, the only remaining barrier to implementing this bold new strategy. If he makes it through the process, then he will undoubtedly play a critical role in the success of the Obama Administration.
/******** Please note the above article is satire. ********/