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Translating Barney Frank

The above video is a recent speech by Congressman Barney Frank of Massachusetts.  Below is my translation:

“The Republican party nationally has moved so far to the right that there has never been a time when it is more important for those of us who have the values of the Democratic Party to keep the government in our hands.”

The Republican Party has, to a large extent, stopped looking to Liberals for advice that will advance our agenda and get them kicked out of office.  They didn’t give us a single vote on health care, how are we supposed to blame them for its flaws?

“The damage these people will do to the environment,”

If BP ever figures out that Republicans might let them drill on land instead of a mile under water, we’re screwed.  No way they’d have given Obama a million bucks if they knew he’d use it to put his boot on their throat or fund his search for asses to kick.

“to the quality of health care availability, to financial regulation,”

We know most voters hate that we’ve taken over the health care industry.  We can’t let Republicans give back that power.  If they do, we may never wrest control over health care from private individuals again. Dittos for financial regulation.

“to the rights of working men and women to organize and bargain collectively, to efforts to combat discrimination.”

Think of union dues as campaign dollars.  We’ve got to make sure they have a constant supply of new members to keep the coffers full.  Also, if anyone asks, Republicans are racist.

“There are no areas where we have a responsibility to each other where they are not as wrong as can be, and I understand that you people are concerned that, ‘well we didn’t get everything done that we wanted to,’ so let me say this, yes, it’s true that because we don’t get every Democrat every time in the Congress, we haven’t been able to accomplish everything we wanted because sometimes a few Democrats will align with the Republicans, but the cure for that is not fewer Democrats and more Republicans.  The cure for that is to send us back.”

I know this was a little long winded and incoherent, but bear with me.  My district went for Scott Brown, a Republican.  He ran on voting against Health Care; I helped jam it through.  I need your vote.

“So I hope .. What the right wing is counting on, in particular, is young people who got excited and voted for President Obama getting turned off because the reality of governing is harder than the speech-making. …. You can reach out to your fellow young people and make it clear to them that while they may not be satisfied with everything that we’ve done—we’re not satisfied with everything we’ve done—the way to cure that is to give us more authority and more ability,”

I also need your friends’ votes.  Browbeat them.  No, I don’t care if they’re not actually from my district, I have power to seize.

“and there is not an issue that is important to young people where the Republican Party—whether it’s financing higher education, or the environment, or any other of those issues that people who are going to be spending the next 40 or 50 years on this earth are going to need to know about—they are dead wrong.”

In conclusion, there is not an issue where the Republican Party is dead wrong.  Wait .. what!? I meant: the Republican party hates young people. They’re ageist.

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  • Damn, so that’s what that putz from the gutters of NY meant. He should go back to running boys out of his apartment, he was far more capable of doing that than he is as the Chairman of Pilfering

    – Chris, http://collegecounterculture.com/

  • Damn, so that's what that putz from the gutters of NY meant. He should go back to running boys out of his apartment, he was far more capable of doing that than he is as the Chairman of Pilfering

    – Chris, http://collegecounterculture.com/